speak

Elena & her two friends came into La today from Tn. 

it was completely random.

we sat outside of Starbucks just rambling on and on about life and change.

i miss her company.

and i hope to share so many more memories with her when i move up that way.

She talked to me a lot about her art and theories.

i was intrigued- even bought a notebook when i left and started writing.

don't worry i'll still keep blogging.

it's just a little something else i can use to let out whatever im thinking about in my head at that moment.

i can't get someone out of my mind tonight.

honestly...

the truth is there

and i don't want to fool myself.

i don't want to get hurt (no one does)

but its a void now, that i can't just cover up

+ plus i don't want to.

can't things just happen (or not happen) and people still live life "knowing" one another so to speak...

meaning: even if two people aren't compatible-when you find out don't cut them off...

what good does that do.

i had a "constant" since March- that is 7 months.

and now- i never hear from them.

it was honestly like a cold turkey cut off from me

im disappointed

i know good things will come

and i hope this person sees the good i was.

i think i deserve something grand & i want to be so much for someone.

i want to do, and try, and love, and care for someone.

friends-family-lovers-strangers

e v e r y o n e

im not the best candidate but who cares

TAKE IT.

because i want it

but ill give instead.