Friday, October 9, 2009


Elena & her two friends came into La today from Tn. 
it was completely random.
we sat outside of Starbucks just rambling on and on about life and change.
i miss her company.
and i hope to share so many more memories with her when i move up that way.

She talked to me a lot about her art and theories.
i was intrigued- even bought a notebook when i left and started writing.

don't worry i'll still keep blogging.
it's just a little something else i can use to let out whatever im thinking about in my head at that moment.

i can't get someone out of my mind tonight.
the truth is there
and i don't want to fool myself.

i don't want to get hurt (no one does)
but its a void now, that i can't just cover up
+ plus i don't want to.
can't things just happen (or not happen) and people still live life "knowing" one another so to speak...

meaning: even if two people aren't compatible-when you find out don't cut them off...
what good does that do.

i had a "constant" since March- that is 7 months.
and now- i never hear from them.
it was honestly like a cold turkey cut off from me
im disappointed
i know good things will come
and i hope this person sees the good i was.
i think i deserve something grand & i want to be so much for someone.
i want to do, and try, and love, and care for someone.
e v e r y o n e
im not the best candidate but who cares
because i want it
but ill give instead.

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