†orn

i've been feeling really torn lately.

my thoughts on people and relationships with people 

have been rapidly changing.

to be without someone (for any amount of time) 

whether it be physically or verbally (as in not speaking)

is certainly hard. --so hard-- if i may.

it's a tough wound to heal- 

so many questions rise when i think back on it.

how can i go back to something, 

Scratch that, how can something go back to the way it was...?

how long does that take?

can it ever be the same?

what was it exactly. 

was i the only one that felt this way, or were you truthful as well.

Once you asked me if i trusted that you weren't going anywhere, 

and i said yes, and to trust that i wasn't going anywhere either... (i meant it) 

and i firmly trusted you.

but what now... 

Do you remember how things were, 

and if you do, were you telling me the truth.

was i the only one? were there others? are there others? were you faithful like you said?

we weren't even "official" but still it makes me wonder-- since time has since passed us now.

what will anything ever become.

a memory... a fairy tale... a dream... reality?

i miss you